Funeral

Today we took Baylor to his second funeral.  The first was when he was about two weeks old and my grandpa had passed.  Lori and I had been talking to him about what was going to happen and tried not to sugar coat anything.  Just the facts needed for a three year old to understand.  I started with asking him if he remembered when Grandma and Buddy's dogs died and we did not see them anymore.  And when the fish died we buried them and put a stone over them? Well, my grandma had died and they were going to put her in a special bed, have a service at the Church, and bury her in the box in the ground.  He first offered that we can share his grandma.  I thanked him and said that his grandma is my mom and of course we can share.  And then he pick up on an opportunity to dig a big hole.  I told him someone would do that for us.  Then he decided we would have to fill up the hole and we should bring our shovels.  Again I explained someone would do that for us too.  I knew I was taking all the fun out of things but I did not want his hopes dashed.  Grandma did not want an open casket funeral but because of some family comments at Grandpa's funeral Dad decided to have a viewing for only close family for a half hour.  We explained Grandma would look like she was sleeping in a special bed and then they would close the lid and it would look like a box.  The last few days he has been asking about going to see her and make sure my grandma was dead and . 

Friday the service started at 2:00 but the viewing was at 1:00 to 1:30.  Baylor did really well seeing her and asked some questions and then he was done, ready to go home.  It took a lot of convincing to keep him there, relatively quite, not running up and down the aisles.  Bethany United Methodist in Red Lion has been the family church for as long as I can remember.  My grandparents were very active in the church and many family events have happened there.

 

 

Grandpa used to pound on my thigh when I was yawning in church.  Not a good memory but it is a strong one unfortunately. 

 

I could not bring myself to take a picture of Grandma. Partly because it did not look like her, she was made up and her hair was styled in a way she never, ever did it.  But she looked really beautiful and I touched her hand to say good bye.  I saw Dad shed a few tears especially after the closed the casket.  The minister never met Grandma and the previous ministers could not attend. 

 

My mom made a memory board and Heather made one also.  They also had a photo collage on to projector screens.  It was nice seeing Grandma when she was young and full of life.  The last three years have been hard on her as her mind drifted into Alzheimer's. 

 

After the grave site service, Baylor asked me if he could finally 'fight' with Connor.  I told them to have at it.  Little boys can only hold still for so long and they need to run.  We went back to the church for a meal and to talk with family and friends.  Baylor had a few bites and ran off to play with Connor, Eli, and Rachel. 

 

Brigid had to join them of course. 

 

 

Jamie drove down from VT yesterday and is staying until Sunday.  We are going to Mom's Saturday and we are spending the night.  We are looking forward to spending time with him. 

 

Eli made Baylor two John Deere fleece pillows as a gift.  Eli has always been drawn to Baylor and I love their friendship. 

 

Baylor and Connor played the piano as people were leaving

 

Baylor and I drove back to the church yard but they were not done filling the grave. 

 

Then we drove past the farm.  It has changed a lot since Grandma moved out.  The family took their time adding on and did not move in until December 2011.  They bought the farm in 2009. Thankfully they are still farming it and have added the horse pastures where we used to grow black raspberries and corn.  Heather and Bob will not go to see it because they want to remember it the way it was. 

 

But I remember how it was. 

 

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On the way out of town we stopped at the light at the square.  We were next to the Red Lion Historical Society. Grandma and Grandpa were very active with establishing the building and donated items to the society.  I even had two post cards on display that I had purchased at an antique store in Lancaster county.  They were addressed to a family in Red Lion in the early 1900's.

 

Baylor feel asleep on the drive home and at 8:15, he is still in the same place.  I guess I will have to take him to bed soon.

 

This was the last Christmas Grandma spent outside the nursing home.  It was the first one after Grandpa died and she was still pretty with us.  She was a good and kind woman.  She may not have had the life she wanted, lived on a farm her entire life and worked hard, but she made the best of it.  I love you Grandma.   

Good Bye Grandma

 

Mom called at 7:00 this morning to tell my my Grandma passed away in her sleep around 3:30.  They were called late last night and were told she was lethargic and was put on oxygen.  Mom and Dad went over for a few hours and she was resting peacefully and no one knew what was going to happen so they went home around 1:30. I feel bad that she was alone when she passed.  It has been a year since I saw her and I do feel guilty about that.  She has been in the home since Grandpa passed in 2008 and was taken over by Alzheimers ever since.  

 

  Heather had gone to see her on Saturday and I am sure she is glad she did.  Heather grew up going to the farm all the time and they were always very close.  We all have wonderful memories of going to the farm for holidays and spending time with family.  When we lost Grandpa, when the farm was sold, and Grandma was no longer able to join us, we all felt a bit of sadness on each holiday.  Now each Labor Day will be filled with sadness as we remember Mary Elizabeth McGinnis Miller who was 92 in July. 

Day 74 and 75

Friday night we went to Steph's house for dinner and a visit.  She made Cherokee tacos with Indian Fry bread they picked up on vacation.  They were really good because who does not like some fried bread covered in chili, lettuce, cheese and sour cream.  Lori stopped by on her way home and when Baylor saw her he asked her to take him home.  I visited for while and had to stop at Nana Heidi's, Steph's mom, on the way home.  The moral of the story is at did not get home until after 8 and it was late.  Baylor wanted to water color and I did not want to that late and told him we could in the morning.  He was not up long before he remember and true to my word, we watercolored.  I bought pipets to use in our art and he discovered the fun of dripping water and water colors on his blocks. 

 

 

 

We played outside and I worked on my painting projects in the garage while he played in the mud, in the bounce house and on the four wheeler.  He had a popsicle break sitting on the doors to the basement.  I have to close the one side because while I don't usually worry about him falling down the hurricane doors, I do imagine him falling down the stairwell. 

 

We watched Madison for several hours while her daddy and his girlfriend, my friend Tamela, went to Hershey Spa for an afternoon of body scrubs and deep tissue massages.  We went swimming right away and Madison who is the same age as Baylor proved to be Mermaid Madison.  She had no fears of the water and can swim under water with ease. She was leaping from the ladder shouting Surfs Up!  All without any float vest which Baylor is not allowed out of.  He does start swimming lessons next Saturday at a local college so hopefully he will be swimming soon.  He is doing better at moving around and nearly doggy paddling to get across the pool.  After swimming, they shared a bath and had a snack.  They played all afternoon, both inside the house and outside.  Amazingly there were no fights or issues.  It was great!   

 

 Sunday we had plans to go to Williams Grove flea market with Heather and Brigid.  Little did we know, or even know to check, it was also the annual Williams Grove Historical Steam Engine Association 54th Annual Summer Show.  It was little boy, and big boy, heaven.  

 

 

 

 As soon as we found each other, the skies opened up and the 30% chance of rain, turned in 100%.  At least where we were standing.  I had decided to not grab the umbrella and Heather did not have one either so we ducked under a pretzel stand to wait it out.  The owner was very nice about it and unfortunately did not have her pretzels yet or we would have enjoyed a snack while waiting for the rain to clear.  Brigid was the only dry one among us because she has a rain cover for the stroller.  The entire time we were there, she was all smiles, waving from her stroller to everyone. 

 

The rain slowed down enough to at least walk around and find something to eat.  By the time we were done, the rain was gone and the place had cleared out enough that it was not difficult to get around and see everything.  Baylor loved it all and was very interested the steam engines. 

 

The saw mill was running and we all enjoyed watching it work.  Baylor's great Grandpa Thatcher had a saw mill rather like this back in his day.  Today they were working on some good sized logs and making planks of about 2 x 8 or so.  The bark and odd pieces were being thrown off to the side.  Some of it was being cut down and used to run the engines on display like the one Baylor was standing next too.  I am sure some of it was sold for firewood.  I did not ask anyone what they did with the lumber but the trailer they were loading left full of wonderfully fresh smelling wood. 

 

 

They were working on this log and came across a nail buried deep in the tree. Many, many years ago someone drove that nail into a skinny tree and left it there.  Thankfully it did not damage the huge saw with its many teeth. 

 

This is the engine that was powering the mill.  We stood on this side of it after I mentioned to Heather how much damaged is caused when those belts slip.  I was not intended to imply we were not is a safe spot, I just remember stories being told about that happening.  Standing on this side made it feel a bit safer.

 

He saw us walking behind the engine and asked if Baylor wanted to stand in the step and see the fire.  He has a pretty good grasp of the steam engine process but seeing it first hand was a treat for all of us. 

 

Around the back of the sawmill was the thrashing machine.  At first we thought it may have been a hay baler, not related to Baylor which means horse trainer(not how he got his name either) but it was throwing out the chaff and straw on one side and the grain was going into a wagon. 

 

I am sure the older man on the thresher may be doing this for fun now had to do this for real when he was younger.  My parents were at our house when we got home (I was not planning on being there for over four hours) and I showed them the pictures we took.  Dad remembers a thresher and engine like this coming to the farm he grew up on during the harvest season.  And Dad is younger than this man.

 

 

The train was running and we took the kids for a ride.  Baylor did really well walking around or sitting on my shoulders and will tell you he liked the train ride, just not all that other stuff.  Except for the ice cream.

 

 

There used to be an amusement park at Williams Grove but it is no longer running.  The flea market used to wind around the buildings but I think some fool got hurt doing something he was not supposed to be doing so it is now all closed off. 

 

 

Baylor did not mind. 

 

There was this little train to see outside the train car.  He was quite interested in making up its story about why it is not working and what it could do. 

 

 

Brigid was finally out of the stroller and very happy to be out with us. 

 

  

Alone the way we 'raced' a tractor.

 

 

Saw fields full of all colors of tractors. 

 

It was a quick ride as the tracks do not go all the way around the fields and grounds as I thought they did.  But again Baylor did not mind.  Once we were back on soggy ground, we headed out with a few stops.  This engine was really revving up and the smoke was amazing.  We picked up some veggies and Heather bought an old toy cash register like one she had at her grandmother's when she was growing up. We did pick up some Halloween items that were a really good price.  Not too much shopping for all the walking around but it was a good Sunday.

 

We had to stop at the grocery store and headed home to see Grandma and Buddy for a visit. After they left Baylor wanted to watch Nemo and fell asleep in his recliner. That was about 5 PM.  It is 9:15 and he is still asleep so I guess I will be taking him to bed soon.  Only 20 days to fall!